Pass Through

We had just loaded bags of clothes into our van. They were on there way to the Salvation Army drop box. This was the 3rd or 4th or 5th time we had done this this year. It got me to thinking... "how much we have been able to give away this year for others in need when it is really our family being blessed by others giving us stuff."

Since we have had children, it has been our practice to take in and pass out clothes that our kids needed and then didn't need. Your family may experience the same thing. Each year, we have been able to set aside certain items and contribute a few bags to those less fortunate. But this year, it has been overwhelming! Since our adoption in April, it seems we have been blessed on every side in an overflowing, abundant manner. We have been overwhelmed with canned goods and dry goods that exceeded our storage ability, so we passed some through to others (10-15 bags full) that could use them and might even need them more than us. It hasn't stopped! We have been overwhelmed with gifts of clothing, hand-me-downs, in wonderful condition at such a level that not only do our 7 children all have boots and coats for the winter, and clothes for the next 2-3 stages of growth... we also were able to pass 15-20 bags (conservative estimate; hefty size) through our hands into the hands of others who had need. Isn't God amazing?

Only He could figure out how to overflow our cup while we were opening our house up to total strangers. Only He could use us to provide for others while we were needing provision. Only He owns a cattle on a thousand hills, and allows some of that provision to pass through our hands into the lives of those around us. As a man, and the leader of my house, and the provider for my wife and children... I am learning to trust Him. His provision far exceeds my ability. I'm excited about letting more pass through!

Seasons

Winter has arrived.

Whoever said our Ethiopian children will not like cold weather has never met my kids. I am constantly saying "Sweetheart, aren't you cold? Why don't you go put on more clothes?" I look at my kids running around the house in bare feet and I shiver. This must be another unfortunate sign that I am aging. As if I needed another reminder.

At precisely 7:10am on Wednesday I heard the pitter patter of little feet turn into a herd of the masses running down the stairs to announce "SNOW!" Then right outside they went, pajamas and all. Evidence as shown.

They didn't make it long out there in their pj's. But Joseph and Ellie came in, got decked out in their winter gear, and played for three hours. Great example of the fun homeschooling can be. I decided to just go with it - and we actually got school done in a "cut in paste" format which was a fun little shake-up.

By evening I lost count of how many hours the kids had all been outside. It was a great first snow fall. Seasons are so refreshing!

Men I Love

Thanksgiving this year was amazing. We had some priceless family time with both of my sisters and their families. We have NEVER been all together before. Never. We have been together, in smaller groups - but never all at the SAME time. It was so wonderful.

What I realized was this....There are a lot of very handsome men in my life. That may sound shallow of me - which I tend to be from time to time, but just look and see for yourself.

Look at this guy - I get to be married to him! He is one of the good ones.

My oldest is turning into a gorgeous young man. He is so much fun to be with. I love, love, love, hanging out with him. (Oh, and my dog, Quincy - if you know me at all, you know what I think of this guy. Woman's best friend.)

Quite handsome for a boy of 10. For more good stuff on this guy, visit my last post.
Because I share not a single genetic chromosome with this little character, I can say without conceit that he is one of the most gorgeous creations God has made.

This is my nephew. God has marked this guy for something amazing- you watch. His gorgeous face is the least of his attributes - so you can only imagine what's on the inside.

I love all these Men. There are actually two missing from my list here but out of all due respect for their humble personalities I have not plastered their pictures on this blog. I will try to add them in a group shot sometime just so you can see that I have two very handsome brothers in law as well!

Ten Again

I love that our Ethiopian kids have been with us seven months now. I love it for many reasons.

First of all, the transition is hard - and we have transitioned.
Secondly, half a year has passed and that means half of a years events have been successfully processed.
And third, the kids have begun to share more with us about their past. This is a great sign of attaching and bonding that we adoptive parents wait for.

Joseph had a birthday this month. He was ecstatic about his special day as he has been in our family long enough to see four siblings celebrate birthdays. This event prompted a conversation about age that we have waited a long time to have.

It appears our suspicions were accurate. It was clear to us in Ethiopia that Joseph was not eight. We actually aged him a full year at our readoption. That put him at nine. He has just shared with us that he was ten when he entered the orphanage. That was a year ago. Well, he just had his first American birthday and he is now ten - again.

We love our son - no matter his age. We are just happy to see that he is trusting us as his parents. It is good.

In honor of our Ten-Again son, here are 10 things I love about Joseph...

1. Joseph is an excellent eater.
2. And he freely shows his gratitude for good cooking!
3. He is a very hard worker around the house. His specialties are cleaning the garage and van.
4. He adores his Uncle Charlie and wants to be with him a l l t h e t i m e !
5. Joseph is a great soccer player.
6. He is very diligent with his school work.
7. He loves babies and really wants one around here!
8. He loves church and memorizing verses for AWANA.
9. Joseph has a beautiful singing voice.
10. Joseph is a happy, happy boy!

The "New Normal"

We have hit a "new normal" around here. I am grateful for this because now I know what I have to work with. We have some work to do with refining relationships, developing self-control, and increasing patience. With homeschooling I get the whole day to work on this stuff. It is not for the faint of heart let me tell you. But by the grace of God, we keep plugging away, and it is good. Very good.

Each October, it has become our tradition, to go to Hocking Hills. People who say Ohio is flat and boring have never visited Hocking Hills. It is beautiful - including 9 different State Parks that cover over 9000 acres of God's handiwork.

This year was extra fun as it was our first with our Ethiopian kids. It would be an understatement to say that they loved it. We had a great day on so many levels. The kids all enjoyed the freedom of exploration, the stimulation of great exercise, and a day off from school.

Brent and I enjoyed largely the same things but one thing that we didn't expect provided the most enjoyment...

Teamwork. Our kids true colors shined this day. They ran together, laughed together, and worked together. A few of the hikes we took had some tricky spots. It was a huge blessing to watch the kids help each other. They would look around for the more challenging climbs, then plan together for how they would execute a successful route. One would go first, turn and help the next - while leaving a strong one on the ground to help with the lift. All the while, I could cruise smoothly behind, taking the safer route, and watch my cute kids.

Our "new normal" is louder, busier and crazier. But we knew that would be the case when we started down this road of growing our family. It is a good life, thanks be to God.

Homesick

When I was a little girl I went through a long period of time when I could not spend the night at friends’ houses. I suffered terribly from homesickness. I would often muster up the courage to try – and things would be going along well until bed time. When the sun went down and I knew bedtime was coming the feelings started. My stomach would be in knots and the fears came.

I remember one night I was attempting to spend the night at my next door neighbor’s house. We were camping out on the back porch. I was lying there in my sleeping bag staring at my house and tears were just pouring. All the lights were on at home and soon I found myself jumping out of my sleeping bag, hoping the fence and running through my front door into my mom’s arms. That is where I wanted to be – with my mom.

My little Brooke is homesick. Her days are pretty good but at night I see the look in her eyes. I know that look – I have felt something similar. Last night was particularly difficult for her. She told me that she has been dreaming a lot about her Ethiopian mom and the dreams are bad.

Here are some of my daughters’ fears:
- that her mom got eaten by an alligator
- that her mom got very sick and died
- that her mom does not know where she is

and the worst of all…

- that her mom forgot about her

No six year old child should have to carry such a burden. It kills me to know that she is suffering like this. I look at her face and the grief she bears and I cry because there is not a single thing I can do to help her.

When I was little and felt homesick I got to go home. Within moments I would be in my own bed safe and content. That will never be possible for Brooke. All I can do is hold her and tell her that her Ethiopian mom loves her very much and she will never forget her.

One day her comfort will be restored. Our heavenly Father loves her more than either her Ethiopian mom or her American mom. The process is just painful.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11

One Thing I Love About You...

Today is Brent's birthday - his first birthday with seven children. Also our Ethiopian kids' first opportunity to see how we can honor our parents on their special day.

This morning, while I (Kris) read about William Penn and the Pennsylvania Colony (1600's history), the kids created beautiful works of birthday art for their father. In addition to a picture each child wrote one reason why they love their dad. Here are the results:

"One thing I love about you, dad is......"

Aaron -"your mobility with a bad back"

Jenna - "the way you always wait patiently until we can pray."

Joseph - "that you teach me about Jesus."

Ellie - "that you are a good dad. I am special to have you as a dad."

Kate - "your great big bear hugs!"

Brooke - "that you are silly and that you love Jesus."

Max - "that you are very strong. You could kill Goliath."

We also enjoyed Brent's favorite Oatmeal Cake and a few token gifts.

Happy Birthday, Brent... One thing I love about you is that you always put us first. Always. I watch you over and over sacrifice your time, energy, and wants for us.

Thank you.

"And People Ask Why We Adopted"

Max: "Mom, in Etopia we don't wake up our mom to go potty in the night. We just go by ourselves."

Mom: "Why don't you wake up your mom?"

Max: "Because we don't HAVE any moms."

(My stomach dropped and the reality of my sons' past hit me again. I picked him up, gave him a huge squeeze, and said...)

Mom: "In America you can wake up your mom."

I often feel like the blessing is all mine.

.

Pancake Monday

There's really nothing quite like a short stack of pancakes to start your week off right. A big batch of pancake batter measured out in over 30 pancakes, cooked on an electric griddle and served with butter and syrup and milk or O.J. Of course, there is a pot of coffee for the cook (me) and the resident computer communicator (Kris emailing her new adoption buddies and/or old friends) in the other room. I usually try to schedule myself to be home on Monday mornings... no meetings, no clients, no distractions! And while this is not always possible, we all look forward to this time. Some weeks, Pancake Monday actually takes place on Tuesday.

Now that school has officially started, mornings are even crazier than they used to be. It is good that we attempt to take this time every Monday morning to count and make sure there are still 9 of us in the family. It is quite possible that one of us could have been lost somewhere in the weekend activities. So far, we have all been present for Pancake Monday. Kris had the kids start reciting John 3:16 before we eat of the stacks in front of us, and then we end Pancake Monday breakfast with a devotional. Here's what we've learned thus far...

Kids need pancakes!
Moms need pancakes!
Dads need pancakes!

And the family needs this time to look forward to. There's some interesting conversation that happens during Pancake Monday that might not happen otherwise. Mixing pancakes with Wisdom, and Trustworthiness, and Boldness, and Diligence, and Courage, and Love is a great recipe for Life. Can someone please pass the syrup...!

Post Adoption - Apples & Attaching

When I was growing up on our farm we had an apple tree that produced different types of apples. I could never figure out "how" this tree was able to do this. It had only one trunk which meant it had only one root system. But when it came time for the apples to ripen, different apples would ripen at different times on different parts of the tree. At least this is what I remember!!! I also recall learning that branches from different types of apple trees had been grafted into the original tree, and through the same root system and trunk system, these different branches could still remain alive and still produce their respective apple fruit. But each apple was good for some specific purpose. My mom knew exactly which apples made the best pie or dumplings, which apples made the best applesauce, which apples made the best apple butter, etc. She knew exactly what to do with each kind of apple.

I think I'm learning that adoption... post-adoption... is a lot like that old apple tree. Sometimes we get Red Delicious. Sometimes we get Yellow Delicious. Sometimes we get Crabapple!!!! And each type of apple (parent and/or child & attitude wrapped together in his or her own skin) has its own unique value and contribution to the overall fruit production. In our efforts to work through the post-adoption process, all of us... all nine of us... have to learn how each of us continue to bear fruit and grow and mature while drawing our source of life from one trunk and one root system. God created the family! He has ordained and appointed the family as the central unit of where we are to grow and mature and learn to bear fruit. He constantly reminds me that He grafted me into His family, and that He has the life sustaining power to feed me and grow me even though I used to draw from a different source. When He made life available to me by adopting me as a son, the resources He gathered through His root system and His trunk were more than enough to help me grow.

If the original tree and the newly grafted -in branches had any feelings at all, I couldn't imagine the PAIN they had to go through to adjust to the new life they suddenly found themselves involved in. I need to remember this when I look at the original branches and the new branches that now make up our tree. We now have a new tree! And while it is very tough, I do see growth spurts and new fruit being produced in ALL of the branches. Praise the Lord!